It's Going To Be Okay
by Evenstar1002
Summary: "Would they ever find the right timing for each other or be stuck in that limbo - where either one of them was drifting away before the other could catch them - forever? How many more of those moments would they actually be granted with before time finally ran out for them?" When Donna's life is on the line, will that finally be the last push they need? (Set somewhere in season 8)
1. Prologue

**A/N: The muse kissed me again in the form of nightmare that I just had to get out of my System. I'll tell you at the end about the dream, so that I don't spoil anything... but I should probably warn you that this fic might be a little angsty. If that doesn't turn you off, then please enjoy the ride :)**

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Prologue

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 _The dark corridor doesn't seem to end. No matter how far she is running, she can never quite reach the light at the end of the hallway. She runs and runs and runs until her lungs are burning and her legs are hurting. And then she runs some more, just because she can not stop. With every passing of a light switch, she pushes the button but no light ever goes on. She can hear his voice in the distant, calling her name. He sounds frantic, scared even, a sound so foreign coming from him that she almost doesn't recognize it. Her pace speeds up, trying to get to him, wanting to tell him that everything was alright. That_ she _was alright. That he didn't have to be scared. She circled the floor once, twice, three times but his office is empty every single time. He yells her name again and she runs a little faster again. His voice is everywhere, the panic in it chilling her to the bones. And it is getting louder and louder until… BANG._

With a hammering heart, cold sweat all over her body and a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, her eyes snap open, momentarily blinded by the brightness of the early morning creeping into her bedroom.


	2. Chapter 1

(Chapter 1)

The sun is shining down mercilessly on the skyscraping towers of Midtown Manhattan, them reflecting the celestial body's light on their innumerable windows and spreading it like mirror balls to the surrounding areas. The muggy summer air is stuck between the deep street canyons and by the time afternoon rolls around, only the bravest of tourists and the hungriest of birds is on the street and in the air. Time seems to slow down. It is hot. Too hot. And in hindsight, no one would deny that it was palpable that a storm was coming.

Inside the building of _Zane Specter Litt,_ all the way up on the fiftieth floor, time seems to move in slow motion as well. While the air conditioning system is fighting an unwinnable fight against the overpowering heat that is pressing through the glass, the inhabitants fight to make it through the day. It is eerily quiet on this specific day and an uneasy feeling spreads in the stomach of the Chief Operating Officer as she makes her way down the hall towards her office.

When Donna passes by Harvey's office, she finds it empty. For a second, she lets her eyes drift to her old cubicle, missing for just that second the old days, when she knew exactly where he was at all times and when they used to be what they used to be. Not that she regrets what they are now, a newer and improved version of their partnership inside and outside of the firm but it is still different and even after all these months it still takes some getting used to. Not being within direct reach or earshot anymore, not being able to just walk through the glass door whenever she feels the need to guide him through his thoughts and emotions, not being surprised by him coming outside and commenting on the way she teases the IT guy or the delivery guy or the janitor guy. Instead, ever since his move back to his old office, they are now physically even farther apart from each other than they had ever been before in the last thirteen years. With a quiet sigh, Donna moves on. From his office. From the memories. And from her thoughts. If only she could move on from that nagging feeling in the pit of her stomach, too.

The adjourning two offices are empty as well, as is the meeting room after that. In the third office she walks by, Charles, one of the new lawyers that Robert had brought with him is sitting at his desk, leaning back in his chair, sweat glistening on his forehead. He has his eyes closed, while he slightly swings from left to right and back again in an even rhythm. She walks by without any comment, passing another empty office before she reaches Louis'. He is sitting on his leather couch with a decanter full of ice water in front of him on the table and a small electric fanner in his hand. Donna hesitates for a second before she enters the room, immediately gaining Louis' attention. He looks up from the file on his lap and his eyes light up at the sight of his favorite colleague.

"Donna, hey! What can I do for you?" he asks with that teeth baring smile of his. For a moment, the nervous flutter in her stomach subsides, while she makes her way to Louis' side, letting herself sink into the space next to him.

"Are you okay?" Louis then asks, worry creasing his forehead.

"I don't know," Donna sighs. "I've got this weird feeling ever since this morning and I just can't shake it."

"What do you mean?" Louis inquires, turning slightly to the side so he can look at her. Donna has her eyes closed and a finger to her lips to silence him. For ten long heartbeats, no one says a word.

"Can you hear that, Louis?" Donna whispers, her gaze looking for his.

"Hear what?" Louis answers in a hushed tone.

"Exactly! Why can't we hear anything? Usually this place is worse than Central Station at this time of the day. The quietness is making me nervous," Donna explains, her voice returning to its usual volume.

"I hadn't even noticed it until you pointed it out. I'm sure it's just the heat," Louis tries but Donna doesn't really hear his words. They sit again in silence, as Louis pours Donna a glass of water, handing it to her. She takes a sip, and another one after that.

"Hey, do you know where Harvey is?" she wants to know and tries to sound as nonchalant as possible.

"Yeah. He and Alex went out this morning to see Maya Ecklestone." Louis immediately replies, holding the fanner in Donna's direction for a few moments before cooling his own face again.

"Is everything okay with Maya?" Donna asks curiously, surprised as to what Maya could possibly be up to. Maya Ecklestone was one of Harvey's oldest clients. Not just in regard to the duration of their business relationship but also in age. Over the last three years, after Maya had turned eighty, she had slowly begun to withdraw herself from her jewelry empire, gradually handing over the business to her granddaughter. By the end of the year, Maya was supposed to retire for good. The contracts had been signed months ago and everything was prepared for a smooth change of ownership. That is why Donna is even more confused for the sudden meeting. A meeting Harvey undoubtedly would have mentioned to her, had he had the chance to do so.

"Something about bribery allegations. Harvey didn't have much time to explain and since you weren't in your office he came to me to let me know where he went."

For the second time that day, Donna regrets that she is no longer Harvey's secretary. She takes another sip from her glass, wishing that it was Scotch instead of cold water, just so it would dull that foreboding tingle in her stomach.

"Alright. Let's hope it's nothing too serious," Donna mumbles before drowning the rest of the water, all the while knowing that it must be serious, otherwise Harvey wouldn't have been gone all day. And he wouldn't have taken Alex with him either. Sighing, Donna gets up from the sofa. "Thanks, Louis," Donna says and touches his shoulder in a grateful gesture on her way out.

"Anytime, Donna. My door is always open for you, you know that."

She does know and she smiles at him before leaving that dorky but lovable man alone in his office.

On her way back to her own desk, her eyes drift to the entrance area, where the two receptionists had stuck their heads together, giggling about something the one was showing the other on her cell phone. Under normal circumstances, Donna wouldn't hesitate to walk over to them and reprimand them for using their cellphones in the open like that. But she can't bring herself to really care and since the floor seems to have shut down anyway, Donna decides to let it drop.

With another sigh and that uneasy tingling intensifying, she sits down in her chair, turning around to look outside. The sun crawls over the blue sky in slow motion, seagulls circling like vultures, waiting for their prey. Donna's gaze drops to her decanter on the window sill and for a moment she seriously contemplates if it is too early to have at least a tiny glass of her favorite past-time drink. She longs for that feeling of calmness and of warmth as the alcohol slides through her veins. She longs for the feeling of her thoughts being swapped away with it into the deep chasm of oblivion. But above all, she longs for the feeling of having _him_ by her side, when they sit down and indulge in the golden liquid together. Throughout the years, ever since they had started on their journey together, it has always been their thing. While they were changing from boss and secretary to boss and boss, their situations and their friendship changing as well, _this_ was the one thing they didn't allow to change. This was their special time. Their sacred time. Not every night but more nights than not. Sometimes they would talk about work. A case. About Mike and Rachel. Sometimes they would talk about his mom or her father or strangers they had seen that day on the street. On rare occasions they would even talk about them, always sliding dangerously close to talking about _them_ but of course never quite brave enough to really do it in the end. And sometimes, they would just sit together in silence, talking about nothing at all and just enjoying each other's calming presence for a couple of minutes before heading home. Alone.

Inhaling deeply, holding her breath for two heartbeats, before releasing it out with a loud swoosh, Donna finally turns around again, shaking her thoughts away and trying to concentrate on the tasks at hand. The Scotch would have to the, seeing as the annual appraisals for the associates wouldn't coordinate themselves after all.


	3. Chapter 2

(Chapter 2)

And still, the afternoon drags on. If anything, it gets even quieter on the fiftieth floor by the time five pm rolls around. There is still no sign of Harvey and when Donna had tried to call him earlier, he hadn't picked up either. For the umpteenth time in one hour, Donna pushes her cell phone to life but the display stays without any response from her colleague. Her best friend. Her _more_. He doesn't know it and she hadn't either until that fateful night a couple of months ago. That night she didn't feel anything even though she felt _everything_. It is still beyond her how she could have done what she did but her emotions had been so raw that day that after Louis had involuntarily pushed her to the edge with his speech about Sheila, she just couldn't take it anymore. She, Donna Paulsen, the master of her and everyone else's emotion, had finally reached her breaking point. Of course, she had immediately regretted putting Harvey in that impossible position with his then girlfriend, but she didn't regret doing it for her own sake and peace of mind. Even though it had brought the clarity she had always sought and always feared.

Donna can still feel his rigid body in her arms, can still feel the confusion rolling off of him in that moment. And she can still feel his soft lips that were so unresponsive at first that it broke her heart, only to be built right back up again when he had finally given in, leaning into the kiss for that nanosecond before she pulled away. The confirmation of her feelings had caught her like a deer in the headlights, Harvey's lost and bewildered eyes so blinding that the only reflex for her had been to flee before being hit by the freight train that was coming for her. But she couldn't run fast enough and when the train did hit, mere moments later on the street, her soul broke and her eyes welled up with tears, making it impossible to see clearly once again in less than five minutes. Just as Donna wondered back then, she wonders now. Would they ever find the right timing for each other or be stuck in that limbo, where either one of them was drifting away before the other could catch them, forever? Would they ever be brave enough to seize one of those rare moments when they were actually drifting towards each other? How many more of those moments would they actually be granted with before time finally ran out for them?

Donna buries her face in her hands, trying to shield herself from the light, the heat and her thoughts. Her body torn between tension and total exhaustion, she lets herself fall back into her chair, when a muffled _bang_ makes her sit straight up again. Donna's heart hammers against her chest, just like it had that morning, pictures of dark hallways and empty offices flooding her mind. For the first time that day, the fiftieth floor comes to life. Donna hesitates for a moment, takes another deep breath, before her sense of responsibility pushes her out of her seat. In slow strides, the COO crosses the room and sticks her head out of the door in the exact same moment Louis does, his little fanner still in his hand.

"What was that?" Donna asks confused, when a second bang disrupts the silence, a little closer this time. Coldness crawls over her skin, full of foreshadowing.

"I'm too afraid to say out loud what I think it was." Louis replies, almost whispering and finally turning off the little gadget in his hand.

Even through the walls, Donna can hear the tramping of heavy footfalls in the stairwell and muffled screams that are getting quieter with every passing moment. The world, at least Donna's world, seems to stop spinning on its axis, when after minutes of hearing only the heartbeat in her ears, the ring of the elevator announces the arrival of a guest. Before Donna sees anything else, she notices the metallic object in the visitor's hand, long before she sees the little woman attached to it. The proportions of the gun compared to the hand that is holding it almost makes Donna laugh and she can only blame the adrenaline in her veins, as the shock of the moment kicks in.

"Donna… go back into your office. Call security. Then hide," Louis hisses, pulling Donna back to the present. It takes her another moment to fully grasp the situation, contemplating in a split second their next moves.

"No, Louis. You call security. And then get as many partners and associates as possible and get them out of here. You know this building better than anyone," Donna replies in a commanding voice, leaving no doubt whose orders would be followed.

"You must be out of your mind if you think I'll leave you here alone," Louis shoots back, not moving an inch as to not draw attention to them any sooner than it would undoubtedly come.

"Louis, don't argue with me. Chances are she is here because of what one of you guys did. So pack them all up and get them out! Do you understand?" Donna argues and the last question sounds more like an instruction than anything else.

"Donna…" Louis starts again but is interrupted before he can say another word. "Louis, please. Go!"

In her peripheral vision, Donna can see how Louis is retreating back into his office. After taking a deep breath, she considers her options, while she doesn't leave the gunwoman out of her sight for even a second. Donna's eyes drop to the reception desk, relieved to find it empty. Wherever Maya and René have went, the redhead silently prays to the powers that be to let them stay there for a little while longer. And even though Donna had never really been a strong believer, she prays some more for the needed strength for what she is about to do.

The only reasonable thing probably would have been to run away. Or to hide. Not to confront a person with a gun in her hand heads on. And yet, that is the exact thing Donna chooses to do. Someone is threatening her family, her home, and if she can do anything to protect even just one of them, she would do it. After another deep breath and some self-encouraging words in her mind, she sets herself in motion. Not wanting to scare or surprise the stranger and risk a shot in the wrong direction, Donna concludes it to be best to meet the other woman face to face. The hallway seems to drag on forever and not once does she notice any other movement than her own and the one of the gunwoman. Just when Donna is about to round the last corner, the lights turn themselves on and off and on again, and a tiny wave of relief washes over her as the knowledge sinks in that the lockdown of the building is firmly in place and that help is most probably on the way. Footsteps echo hollowly behind her and away from her, as she closes the distance to the most terrifying situation of her life.

"Ex…. Excuse me? Can I help you?" Donna asks cautiously, as she comes to a halt ten feet away from the stranger. Her face is gentle, framed by short, spiky, blonde hair and the short floral dress that she is wearing fits perfectly, giving her the appearance of your friendly next-door neighbor, the weapon in her hand even more of a stark contrast just then. The woman doesn't even seem to notice Donna at first, looking straight through her before she focuses on the redhead at last. The gun drops to her side, confusion and anger mixing in her gaze. It is a dangerous combination and Donna knows it. _Feels_ it in every cell of her body.

"I'm looking for Harvey Specter," explains the woman, her voice sounding eerily calm and polite, considering the circumstances. Donna's heartbeat speeds up, a new kind of nervousness overcoming her. She tries to hide it but she can feel the pulse throbbing in her ear and cold sweat forming on the small of her back.

"He's out on a business trip today and won't return to the office before tomorrow," Donna lies and hopes she sounds as confident and convincing as possible.

"That's unfortunate," the stranger says, looking around in silence for a moment. "Can you please call him and ask him to come in today?" The woman asks and if she wasn't holding a gun in her hand, it would have sounded like nothing but a natural request.

"I just tried to call him half an hour ago. He didn't pick up then either. I guess he is still with his client."

"Please call him again. I need to see him today," the woman presses, her voice now becoming a bit more urgent.

"Believe me, if he was available, he would have returned my call by now." Donna explains to the woman, while a feeling of protectiveness curses through her, making her braver. Someone coming in here and threatening her family was one thing. But someone threatening Harvey? That was, is and always will be something that Donna is never going to just sit by and watch without doing something to prevent it if she could help it.

"Oh. You must be Donna Paulsen then," the stranger assesses and Donna knows without a doubt that things just got worse, if that was even possible.

"I am," she answers confidently. "And who are you, if I may ask?"

"The woman who needs to speak to Harvey Specter."

"Like I said, Mr. Specter is…"

The gun comes up again and even from afar, Donna can see the dark and deadly abyss of the barrel. Twenty years ago, she had looked at a weapon once, on stage and even though she had known back then that it was just a mockup, it had felt oppressive and scary. But that is nothing compared to what she is feeling in this very moment. Even more so now, while she is no longer just scared for her own life but for the life of Harvey as well. Donna puts on a mask of nonchalance and she hopes that it covers the real fear that is slowly making its way through her veins. She can hear nothing but the sound of her heartbeat, see nothing but the metallic object pointed at her and feels nothing but heat and fear, suffocating her under its heaviness. The two women stare each other for a long moment, before Donna finally snaps out of it, trying to push her emotions into the very corner of her heart, where all those other unwanted feelings have resided for decades.

"Okay. Okay," Donna replies, raising her arms in defeat. "Let's call him again and see if we can reach him. My office is over there," the redhead suggests, pointing with her thumb behind her back.

They walk in silence, with Donna two strides ahead, feeling the presence of the other woman - and especially the presence of the deadly weapon – behind her back, every step of the way. After reaching their destination, Donna walks straight to her desk. Her four walls, while she may not have inhabited them for very long, have always been her safe haven those last couple of months. When things at the firm became too hectic or things with Harvey too intense, she could always count on the safety of her space. But that feeling is now all of a sudden gone. Instead, it and she and everything around her feel violated by that malicious energy polluting the sacred tranquility.

"Come on. Call him. I don't have all day," the woman says, motioning with her pistol in the direction of the telephone, the newfound aggravation in the stranger's voice aggravating Donna in return. Before she picks up the receiver, she sends another quick prayer to heaven that Harvey won't answer.

"Don't do anything rash, you understand? Just tell him to come here," the woman adds while Donna is dialing his number instead of just hitting speed dial, just to prevent the inevitable for two seconds longer.

After letting it ring for a couple of moments, the call goes to voice mail, relief flowing through the COO. "See, I told you he wasn't available," Donna replies, putting the receiver back down with a loud click.

"Then we will wait for his return call," the woman says and Donna watches her, as she puts the weapon in the back of her pants.

No one says a word after that and as the silence drags on, Donna loses every sense of time. For all she knows, minutes or hours could pass right before her eyes. Aching for some kind of stress relief, Donna leans back in her chair, trying to block out the unbearable heat that keeps her from breathing normally, all the while cold terror and flashes of bravery fight for dominance inside of her mind. One second, the thought of a bullet piercing through her skin, the blinding pain that it would most probably cause, or even worse, having to watch Harvey suffer through it, fills her up with so much fear and anger that it is paralyzing every cell in her body. And in the next moment, those exact same thoughts and images stir courage in her that makes her want to jump at the stranger, wrestle the gun from her hand and chase her out of _her_ goddamn home. Inwardly, Donna curses herself for never having taken a lesson in self-defense, something she puts on her mental to-do list right then. She has absolutely no idea how to fight, where to land a punch to make it really hurt or how to unarm a person that is holding a gun and that's why she knows that fists are not an option. Not being able to do nothing however, she uses the only other weapon she knows how to wield. Her words.

"You know… you could just walk out of here. I don't know who you are, so there is no way to trace you. You disappear and no one will ever know what happened here," the chief operating officer in her comes forth, hoping against hope to end this nightmare before it gets even worse.

A cold giggle echoes through the room. "Do you think I'm stupid? One of your guys surely has called the police by now and told them what's going on up here. Or do you want to tell me that it's normal for it to be this empty around here on a Wednesday afternoon? Then your firm must be in a lot of trouble."

Before Donna can come up with a convincing reply about some kind of emergency or a company outing and as if on cue, there is movement in the corner of Donna's vision. It doesn't go unnoticed by the blonde either and without a second's hesitation, her hand grasps for the gun again, holding it out. Hope surges through Donna and she is that close again to just jump up and tackle the woman, who is momentarily distracted by two police officers entering the floor through the stairwell entrance. Donna calculates the risk in her head, deciding at last to not play the hero and instead waiting for the police to do their job. They are already here, so it surely would only be a matter of minutes now before she would be saved. Wouldn't it?


	4. Chapter 3

(Chapter 3)

The two officers have not yet discovered them, so when the blond woman suddenly screams in a threatening tone, Donna can see them flinch in surprise for a micro second before they are trying to locate the source of the sound. "DO NOT COME ANY CLOSER, OR I WILL SHOOT HER!"

Donna winces, as she can feel the other woman moving behind her, pressing the gun straight to the side her head. Just when Donna had thought the fear could not get any worse, the feeling of death pressed against her temple convinces her otherwise. She closes her eyes, wishing that the technique for all those breathing exercises she had learned in yoga classes, hadn't been wiped from her memory in that moment.

The two men finally find them, watching them intently through the thick glass wall that is separating them from their target. "Please, Mrs. Nightingale, drop your weapon and then we can talk about whatever it is that you want."

"I want to talk to Harvey Specter and I want to talk to him now. So you better bring him to me! Until then, I have nothing to say to you! And if you don't leave right now, I _will_ hurt her, do you understand?" Right until this second, Donna still hadn't been entirely sure if the woman would have it in her to actually pull the trigger if push came to shove. Hearing the callousness and anger in her voice however, Donna no longer has any doubt that she _would_ do it if necessary.

"Alright, alright. We will see what we can do about Mr. Specter. In the meantime, what do you say about me staying with you in exchange for Ms. Paulsen?" suggests the taller of the two police officers, his posture poised and straight. Donna can see how the other one is scanning the area, taking in all the details of the layout.

"I say I'd much rather have Ms. Paulsen stay here with me if I want to ensure that Mr. Specter shows up. So you can save all your words and psychological tricks and just leave us the hell alone until you return with what I want!"

The two police men look at each other for a moment, communicating wordlessly before returning their attention back to the hostage and its taker. "Alright. We will be in contact. And please, stay calm until we return." The leading officer takes one last look at Donna, nodding encouragingly in her direction, before the two of them retreat and disappear through the door. Donna's heart sinks, the hope she had felt only seconds before being knocked out by terror with a single punch straight to the gut.

"Is this really necessary?" Donna hisses, as the Nightingale woman pulls the gun away and for the first time in what seems like forever, Donna can finally take a deep breath. "You know, if you are really ready to kill me, the least you could do is tell me what I might be dying for." Donna tentatively touches her temple, almost fearing the weapon had left a visible mark while realizing that it had undoubtedly left an everlasting, invisible mark. And she doesn't know what is worse.

"I just need to talk to Harvey Specter. And if he is not ready to help me, I want to look into his eyes and see his expression when I hurt him as much as he hurt me, when he took away the one thing I loved the most."

While all the names and cases and files that Harvey had ever taken care of rattle through her mind, Donna also tries to come up with a way to get to learn more about the woman. Normally, she would have no trouble whatsoever to get all the information she wanted or needed, her smile and charm and wit always the way to any men's and most women's heart. But in this situation, a smile or witty response would get her nothing except for maybe a bullet in her head and she is not ready for that just yet. So she stays calm, cautious and with just the right amount for curiosity. "That is a very cryptic explanation."

"And it is the only one you will get for now. There is a time for talking and there is a time for silence. Right now it is the latter. So please, just shut up!"

Donna contemplates saying more but decides against it, knowing that she won't get any more answers out of her, if she does not want to talk.

"No. You know what? Let's try calling Harvey again," the gunwoman says after a couple of moments, nodding in the direction of the telephone. Sighing, Donna picks up the phone, hitting speed dial number 1 this time around. Just like the other times, the call goes to voice mail after a couple of rings. Over the next hour, they repeat this game over and over again and with every failed attempt, Donna can feel the agitation in the other woman rise.

She was just about to push Donna to pick up the phone again, when it starts to ring on its own, making Donna's heart stop for one moment. When she doesn't recognize the number however, she hesitates to answer.

"Come on. Pick it up and put it on speaker. And no games, remember," the Nightingale reminds her and to emphasize her request, she puts the gun back to Donna's head, the terror of the sensation not getting the least bit easier.

"Zane, Specter, Litt, Donna Paulsen speaking."

"Ms. Paulsen, this is Lieutenant Matthew Hill. I'm the leading officer in this case. I trust I'm on speaker?" The man on the other end of the line introduces himself.

"Yes, you are, Mr. Hill," Donna answers, relieved that the police still seems to work on getting her out of this situation.

"Melanie Nightingale?" Mr. Hill says, his voice firm yet friendly.

"Do you have Mr. Specter with you?" The woman asks straightforwardly.

"We are working on it. In the meantime, is there anything else we can do for you?"

"I already told your colleagues. I only want to talk with Harvey Specter. Get him in here. Otherwise I have nothing to say!"

"Mrs. Nightingale, wait. We promise we will get you Mr. Specter. But I'm sure you know how these things work. We give you something, you give us something in return," the Lieutenant tries to wager but Donna knows the second the words leave his mouth that there would be no bargaining happening right now.

"There is nothing I can give you, because I sure as hell will _not_ give you Ms. Paulsen," Melanie replies, anger clearly audible in every word.

"Can you at least promise not to hurt her," sounds the deep voice of the police man through the line.

"For now. But bring me Mr. Specter or I will _not_ guarantee for her safety," is all Melanie says before she ends the call.

Donna falls silent for a while, not wanting to anger the other woman any further. Her own heartbeat is slowly returning to its normal rate after the phone call had heightened all of her senses. For a moment, she had believed that Harvey was finally calling back. And it had scared the shit out of her because as much as she longs to hear his voice, she does not want to have him anywhere near here. As so often in the last hours, the conflicts in her head seem to become too much. She wants to be brave and yet fear puts all these horrific pictures inside of her head that make it almost impossible to think clearly. Over and over again she tries to come up with ways to get herself out of this mess. Any other situation, she is sure she could handle, but she knows that her usual methods to handle trouble are to no avail here. So the redhead remains silent, hating the fact that there is nothing that she can do.

Donna has no idea if another five minutes or five hours have gone by, when she hears and feels her cellphone vibrating on her desk. Her heart leaps and breaks at the same time, when _his_ face finally shows up on the display, announcing the incoming call. There is nothing Donna wants more than to let herself be calmed by his presence. And simultaneously she knows that once she'll answer his call, he would be in grave danger, either because she wouldn't be able to keep him away or because he would be too chivalrously to _stay_ away.

"You know the drill. Pick it up. And don't say or do anything stupid," Melanie repeats, holding the gun to Donna's head. A wave of panic rolls over Donna, crushing her lungs and making it impossible to breath. Tears well in her eyes and she hates herself for showing weakness when all she wants to do is be brave. For herself. And for him. So she closes her eyes, takes a deep breath and musters all the strength that she can find, before picking up the phone.

"Hey Harvey," she greets him, anxiously awaiting his reply.

"Hey Donna. Everything okay? I've never had ten missed calls from you before. _Ever_. If you miss me that much, you could have just said so," Harvey chuckles and the sound is balm to her scared heart. For a second Donna forgets the gun and relishes in his laugh.

"I… I was just worried. Louis told me what happened and I wanted to make sure everything was alright," Donna explains, trying to suppress the shaking in her vocal cords.

"Yeah, everything's good. At least, it's nothing that Alex and I won't be able to handle. Listen, I'm on my way back to the office now. Let's talk when I get there, alright?" Harvey replies and he sounds as strong and confident as ever. It's one of the many things she loves most about him. His unwavering strength and optimism, no matter the circumstances. She knows, were he here, she would not be quite as scared as she is in that moment. And at the same time, she knows she would probably be a thousand times more scared because the thought alone of having to watch Melanie holding a gun to _his_ head drives Donna nearly insane.

So in a quick spur of the moment, a moment in which she draws strength from his strength, she replies: "Look, it's really quite around here and most of the staff has already left. Why don't you take the rest of the day off as well and enjoy the weather." While Donna is firing out the words, she can feel the gun being pressed against her temple even harder.

"Enjoy the weather? Donna, are you okay? You do know me, right?" Harvey replies in a confused tone, torn somewhere between amusement and worry.

"I… Yes…. Yes, of course. I just thought you could use an evening off," Donna says and her heart sinks as she can hear the trigger being pulled back. A sharp hiss escapes her lips, before she covers her mouth with one hand to keep her from other sounds leaving her mouth.

"Donna? What was that?" Harvey asks and even through the phone, Donna can hear that Harvey already knows the answer. "I'm coming for you."

"Don't!" is all Donna can yell into the phone before it's yanked out of her hand and thrown into the corner of her office.

"I told you to not do anything stupid, woman! What is your definition of stupid?" Melanie wants to know furiously, beating the clip of the pistol against Donna's head, making her seeing stars and drawing blood from a small cut at the hairline.

"Marching into a law firm with a gun in your hand and taking a hostage is definitely one definition in my book," Donna replies angrily, looking sternly into the gunwoman's eyes.

"Do not push me!" Melanie hisses through gritted teeth, weaving with the weapon still dangerously close to Donna's head. "Or this little wound here will not be the last," she threatens, pushing the barrel against the laceration on her head. Donna sharply bites her lips together as a piercing pain passes through her body like a lightning and she can feel another warm stream of blood trickling down her temple.


	5. Chapter 4

(Chapter 4)

As soon as Harvey steps out onto the street, the heat hits him like a slap in the face. Compared to the air conditioned meeting room they had just been sitting in all day long, going outside feels like running against a wall. A wall so high that even though Ray is only standing a few cars down the street, those couple of meters seem like an unbreachable barrier.

"Oh man. What is that?" Alex moans beside him, looking up at the sky.

"It's called midsummer in New York City, my friend," Harvey replies dryly, patting his colleague on the shoulder.

"Can we just go back in please?" Alex whines, walking backwards in the direction of the Ecklestone headquarter.

"Don't let me stop you. But I've had enough of this place for one day," says Harvey as he starts walking towards the car to get out of the heat. "But hey, you've been a huge help today. Without you, I'd probably still be sitting inside. So why don't you take the rest of the day off? It's late already as it is."

"Are you sure? Don't you want to get the request for the subpoena out tonight?" Alex asks, while secretly hoping that Harvey would stick to his offer.

"Yes, I'm sure. It's not like anything will hit the fan tonight. We'll do it first thing in the morning. Go home, enjoy your evening," affirms Harvey, just then reaching the vehicle. "Do you need a ride?"

"I'm good, thanks, Harvey. Also for taking me with you to let me help on the case," Alex smiles, extending his hand towards his boss.

"I'm the one having to say thank you, Alex. It's always nice to have back-up with me and I didn't have that much fun working on a case ever since Mike left. So yeah, thank _you_ ," replies Harvey, shaking the hand of the young man.

"Anytime. I'm always happy to help you, you know that."

"Yeah, I do. Thanks again. Have a nice evening and I'll see you tomorrow!" Harvey bids farewell, before opening the door of the black Lexus.

"See you tomorrow," Alex nods, before braving the heat and making his way down the street. Harvey looks after him for all but two seconds before he lets himself fall into the backseat of the car, closing the door with a loud slam to keep the unbearable stickiness outside. As always, after polite greetings, Ray wordlessly sets the car in motion.

Taking a couple of deep breaths, Harvey reluctantly pulls out his cellphone from the inside of his suit jacket. He hadn't looked at it since their short lunch break and almost feared all the missed calls and unread e-mails that would most probably show up in just a second.

A sinking feeling spreads in the pit of his stomach as soon as he sees that Donna had tried to call him several times, not only from her cellphone but from her business line as well. He knows that she knows that he hates it when people call him more than once, in an era where caller's IDs are saved and shown for a reason, so he immediately knows that it must be something serious. Without hesitation or looking through his other calls, he presses the button to call her back.

"Hey Harvey," sounds Donna's relieved yet somewhat strained voice through the line.

"Hey Donna. Is everything okay? I've never had ten missed calls from you before. _Ever_. If you miss me that much, you could have just said so," Harvey replies jokingly yet still unsure, the tone in Donna's voice throwing him off of his game.

"I… I was just worried. Louis told me what happened and I wanted to make sure everything was alright," his COO explains and while he believes without a doubt that she's speaking the truth, Harvey can't shake the feeling, that there is more to it. He knows she would not have called that many times just to ask if everything was okay.

"Yeah, everything's good. At least, it's nothing that Alex and I won't be able to handle. Listen, I'm on my way back to the office now. Let's talk when I get there, alright?" Harvey says firmly, trying to shorten the conversation, because whatever it is that is bothering her enough to call him ten times in less than two hours, he wants to ask her in person and look her in the eyes while he is at it.

"Look, it's really quite around here and most of the staff has already left. Why don't you take the rest of the day off as well and enjoy the weather." That sinking feeling intensifies as soon as she started firing out the words that sound so strange coming from her that he is surprised she's not even tumbling over them in the first place. That is the moment he knows that something is very _very_ wrong. If he was the driver of the car, he'd be pressing the accelerator right about now, flying through the evening rush hour traffic.

"Enjoy the weather? Donna, are you okay? You do know me, right?" Harvey voices his confusion, trying to hide it under a confident chuckle though. There is a slight pause on the other line before Donna speaks again.

"I… Yes…. Yes, of course. I just thought you could use an evening off," Donna suggests. And just seconds after that, it is no longer her voice that's worrying him the most but the clicking noise that sounded suspiciously like the pulling of a trigger.

"Donna? What was that?" Harvey asks mortified, already knowing without Donna's confirmation that it was exactly that. "I'm coming for you."

"Don't!" is all he can hear before the line goes dead, leaving him panicked and riled up all at once in the back of the car. "Ray! Go as fast as you can!"

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Ray has barely parked the car, when Harvey already jumps out of it, breaking into a sprint to get into the building. He is stopped however by two police officers who are blocking the entrance next to the revolving door that is standing still for the first time he can remember.

"Sorry, Mister, but this building is on lockdown. We can't let you in," the man on the left says, putting his hand against Harvey's chest to keep him from coming closer.

"I'm Harvey Specter and I'm a name partner in this firm. I need to get in there!"

"You are Harvey Specter? We have been trying to contact you for hours!" Harvey's heart sinks even more at the realization that if they needed _him_ there, Donna was being in there for a reason. _"Because of you,"_ says a malicious voice in his head. Officer Calman steps aside, opening the door for him. "Over there at the reception is Lieutenant Hill, he's leading this operation."

With a confident stride, more determined than ever, Harvey walks up to the group of police men, who are all gathered around the security monitors, deep in conversation. He's so focused on the group, that he doesn't even notice Louis and Samantha sitting in the seating area to the left of the entrance.

The guy directly behind the reception desk notices Harvey first, looking up with a serious expression on his face. "Mr. Specter?"

"Yes, that's me. What the hell is going on here?" Harvey wants to know without any further introduction or words of welcome.

With a stern look in his eyes, the man dressed in his black gear comes around the reception desk with an extended hand. "It's nice to meet you Mr. Specter. I'm Lieutenant Matthew Hill. I'm the head of this operation."

"And what exactly is this operation?" Harvey asks impatiently, shaking the hand of Mr. Hill.

"First of all, let me tell you that we have everything under control and that you don't need to worry," the Lieutenant says, trying to reassure Harvey.

"That's nice of you to tell me but I really don't care if you have everything under control or not. I just want to know what's going on!" Harvey grows more and more agitated.

"There is a woman up on the fiftieth floor with a gun. Her name is Melanie Nightingale. Your colleague Mr. Litt has recognized her, which gives us an advantage. We've already tried to talk to her to find out what exactly it is she wants but she's adamant on talking only to you. Do you have any idea what this is about?"

"I have a slight inkling. But first I want to know if anyone is still up there with her?"

"Mr. Litt has done an amazing job in getting almost all of your colleagues out. Donna Paulsen ordered him to leave the building with the associates and partners while she wanted to stay and talk to Mrs. Nightingale," Mr. Hill explains and Harvey doesn't know if he should feel angry or proud of the redhead.

"Damnit, Donna," he exclaims under his breath, barely audible to anyone but the police man standing right in front of him. The need to get to her robs him of his ability to breath. His heart rate speeds up and if he could, he would just run up to the fiftieth floor all by himself right in this second. "What have you done to get her out of there?"

"Two of my guys have talked to Mrs. Nightingale but she was threating to…" Mr. Hill stops midsentence, eying the man before him and weighing how honest he could be with him. "She was threatening to hurt Ms. Paulsen if we didn't get you to her, so we made her promise to not do anything imprudent until you arrived. She agreed. A squad is waiting on the 49th floor right now to move forward. We've been keeping an eye on the situation from down here but the security cameras don't give us much insight on what is happening. They've been inside of Ms. Paulsen's office the entire time, mostly in silence from what we can say."

"Okay, I'm going up there right now to talk to that crazy woman," Harvey states demonstratively, determination hardening his face.

"So you are willing to speak with her? We're going to reduce the risk, of course, but I do have to warn you that you could get hurt in the process," Mr. Hill explains, giving Harvey the chance to still get out of it.

"I will do anything to get Donna out of there," Harvey returns without a second of hesitation, the two men looking knowingly at each other. "Is she doing okay?" Harvey asks after a few moments.

"She's holding up," Mr. Hill nods encouragingly at the name partner.

"Of course she is. She's Donna," Harvey replies matter-of-factly and he can almost hear Donna's voice echoing through his mind. A proud smile tucks on the corner of his lips for a split second and only someone looking closely enough would have even seen it.

"What does that mean?" Mr. Hill asks confused.

Harvey looks at the guy as if it is the stupidest question he has ever heard. If Donna wasn't in such grave danger, if his heart wasn't pounding at the prospect of losing her and if the need to get to her and to protect her wasn't taking control over his body and mind, he would tell him that that shouldn't even _be_ a question. That Donna would always hold up because she didn't get scared easily and even if she did, she would fight until the end to not show any weakness. That she could talk people into doing pretty much anything that she wanted them to do and that if she runs out of words, she still had that breathtaking smile of hers that is just as convincing as her words are. That she could kick everyone's ass out there just as much as he did, naturally not with the knowledge of the law but with her brilliant mind and wit and with a self-confidence that is so all-encompassing that she takes his breath away every time he so much as just thinks of her. That at the same time she emanates so much warmth and compassion that make you want to tell her all of your secrets. That she used to make his life at the firm easier as his secretary and makes it easier now as his COO, just by being her. And endless source of advice, insight, clarity and empathy. His guide and his rock. He would tell Mr. Hill how all these are the reasons why he admires her so much, why he wants her in his life.

And yet, those reasons are just the tip of the ice berg. What lies beneath the surface - the other eighty percent that keep him floating yet stabilized, that are his basis and his anchor - are the reasons why he _loves_ her and why he _needs_ her in his life. The way she is not only his guide and his rock when it comes to his work life but also, and even more importantly so, his personal one. How she always knows what to say and not once in the past thirteen years had been too afraid to say whatever she thought she needed to say. Even when she knew that he probably didn't want to hear it. How he could always count on her for being there for him, at every time of the day or night and how she would just stop doing whatever she was doing to help him, how she has always put him first. And he knows that he has taken advantage of it too many times and has not thanked her enough for it just as many times. How she makes him stronger, braver and more confident and how she is the reason why he doesn't want to ever stop becoming even stronger and braver for her, especially in situations like these. How he wants to be a better person _and_ a better man. For her. How she is the reason for _family_ still having a meaning at the firm after everyone has left and how she is the reason he has a family again outside of it as well. And how, every other day, when time is ticking and moments are passing, he imagines what it would be like to start a real family with her. How he can still feel her soft skin under his fingertips, her body tightly wrapped around his, how he can still hear her moan his name, still see that look of amazement in her eyes and feel that same kind of amazement in his soul, even though it had been thirteen years ago, and how she has made it impossible for him to find something comparable in another woman, when he knows that nothing will ever be able to compare to perfection. How his lips still tingle from their last kiss and how it had been the key to freeing feelings that had been denied for far too long. How she had confused him, hurt him and turned him on all at once and hurt him some more the next day, when she had told him she didn't feel anything, taking away his _everything_. How he still couldn't let go of her and the thought of them, just like that. _Never_ like that. Of course, he would not tell Mr. Hill all of those reasons, but he does feel them all the same anyway.

However, seeing as Donna is in grave danger and his heart is pounding at the prospect of losing her and he wants nothing more than to just get to her and protect her, he at last decides to just shake his head. "Never mind," he sighs defeatedly. He focuses back on Mr. Hill in front of him. "So, what do I have to do to get her out of there?"


	6. Chapter 5

(Chapter 5)

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said," Donna begins, once she can feel that the tensed energy in the room has subsided. "Listen, I don't know what Harvey has done to you. But please, believe me, he is not a bad person. He would never purposely do anything to hurt anyone." She has no idea what she is doing, why she is trying once again to convince her with words when Melanie so clearly does not want to hear anything about it.

The woman in question looks at her. At first, she seems to get angry again but after only a couple of seconds, realization and amusement enlightens her face.

"Look at that. So it _is_ true, isn't it?" Melanie replies, finishing with a chuckling sound.

"What is?" Donna asks confused, immediately getting the feeling that she is not liking where this conversation is going now.

"What they say. About him and you," Melanie laughs, sitting down on the chair opposite of Donna.

"You will have to get a bit more specific this time around because I have no idea what you are talking about." Inwardly, Donna sighs, hating to be called out on whatever _it_ was between him and her yet again. Why is it that everyone seems to have an opinion about them? How is it that even strangers knew about them? When there was nothing _to_ know? And why on earth did Donna seem to have led more conversations about Harvey and her with everyone else in the last couple of months than she had with Harvey?

"Please. I've seen the look on your face when he called. I've heard the fear in his voice when he said he'd be coming for you. It all just confirms what people out there say about you," Melanie replies. "In fact, the look in your eyes just now confirms it even more."

Donna doesn't reply, knows that she doesn't even need to because she knows her emotions are too close to the surface as the exhaustion of the day is slowly creeping into her bones and it costs her all of her strength not to break down as it is.

"And that is why we can just remain silent and wait for the inevitable to happen." Melanie gets up from the chair, coming to sit on the window sill behind Donna, thus giving her the best view over the floor.

Donna leans back again, closing her eyes. She tries to inhale into her stomach but her ribcage feels like it is squeezed by an invisible iron fist, keeping the oxygen from where it is needed. Every attempt to let go of the tension, no matter what she tries, is to no avail. She wants to scream. She wants to cry. She wants to run and at the same time just lay down and sleep for three days because she feels so goddamn drained. With a sigh, Donna lets her hand glide over her face. The cut on her temple has stopped bleeding but her head still hurts in rhythmic impulses, consistently with her heartbeat.

Only when Donna opens her eyes again moments later does she realize that the sun has moved around the building, beginning its slow descent. She turns slightly towards her windows, looking longingly outside. While it is still early for business matters in the firm, Donna knows that outside on the streets, life is gradually starting to speed up again with people heading home from work, colleagues meeting in one of the thousands pubs for a after work party, tourists catching dinner before going to watch a show on Broadway and sport fanatics getting ready for one of the uncountable fitness courses in Central Park. If anyone walking or running by the firm would guess what is going on inside? Were there police cars all around, blocking the streets? Or were they hiding inside, trying not to attract too much attention? Were they even still there? Donna's heartbeat accelerates. _Harvey_. Surely, they would stop him from doing anything stupid, right? They wouldn't send him up there? At least not without back-up? Would they? Another silent sigh rushes out of her mouth, while she is trying for the umpteenth time to calm down. They wouldn't let anything happen to him. They couldn't. There was still so much left to say. So much left to do.

When Donna will look back on this day, subject to the condition that she survives, she might say that this was the second she decided that she did not want to waste another moment telling Harvey how she really felt. After the kiss all those months ago and after the way Harvey had looked at her, the lie that she hadn't felt anything came all too easily over her lips that next day and he had all too easily bought it, the consequences too grave and unpredictable, their feelings having been buried under rules and pretenses, pride and fear for too long to just take the plunge like that. But it is that moment, when everything is on the line, when they just might have let that last moment be their _last_ moment, that Donna decides it is finally enough. That it can no longer go on like this. She needed to tell him, they needed to talk it out, once and for all. And as much as she loves her job and her family and her home, she loves Harvey even more. And in this moment, she is finally ready to risk it all. Risk it all to get everything or nothing at all.

A new flicker of hope swells in her heart, as does the fear that it could all be taken away by one single shot. But she could not let that happen. She would do _anything_ to not let that happen. Not now, when she had finally realized what she needed to do. Donna could feel her brain starting to rattle, slow at first but then incessantly shooting new thoughts and plans at her for how to get out of this precarious situation. Until a slight tingle on her skin, the one that she only ever felt when he was near, knocks the wind right out of her again. The tension in her body gives way as soon as Donna feels his presence, seconds before she can actually hear his voice. The wall she had fought so hard to keep upright during the whole ordeal comes crashing down at the sound of his concerned "Donna" upon entering her office. She turns around slowly, no strength left now to hide the despair on her face.

"Harvey… what the hell are you doing here," Donna whispers sorrowfully, their eyes meeting in an intense connection, almost making them forget what had brought them into this situation in the first place.

"Shut up!" Melanie hisses, getting up from the window sill behind Donna, instantaneously aiming her weapon in Harvey's direction. It is the exact picture Donna had feared those last few hours and it is even worse now seeing it for real. In the blink of an eye, it could all be over. In the blink of an eye, they would have missed their chance forever. Donna's eyes are firmly on Harvey and she can hardly believe that he seems to feel no fear whatsoever, his eyes stern, his face not giving away anything.

"I'm here now. Let her go," are the first words he directs at the gunwoman.

" _You_ do _not_ get to make any demands, understand?" Melanie replies angrily, taking another huge step towards him. Harvey breaks their eye contact for a moment to look at Donna again. _Are you okay_ , his gaze seems to ask and the redhead's strength suffices only for a single nod, before he returns his attention back to Melanie.

"Okay. Sorry. Sorry, I won't. But can you at least lower the gun, so we can talk about _your_ demands? Please?" Harvey asks and if Donna wouldn't _know_ that there must be at least some fear inside of him, she would have claimed that he sounded as confident as one could possibly sound in the eye of death that is all but the pulling of a trigger away.

Harvey's movements slow down when he reaches the middle of the office, standing no more than three feet away from Melanie. "I heard you wanted to speak to me and no one else. It took some convincing because Mr. Hill was reluctant to let me handle the situation but here I am," Harvey explains convincingly, and while his movements have slowed down, he does not stop walking entirely. While he tries to engage Melanie in a conversation, he takes baby steps towards Donna's desk, slowly but surely putting himself between the two women.

Unnoticed or at least uncommented by Melanie, with Harvey's movement he manages to turn her slightly around so that she now has her back to the entrance through which Harvey just came in. Donna can no longer see his face but his posture is upright, his shoulders pulled back and his body emanates as much confidence as his expression and words do. For what seems like the first time that day, she inhales, letting the oxygen run through her veins. His calmness soothes her battered nerves and even though the fear for his life is still unbearable, she trusts in him, just like she always does, to know what he is doing. He had promised her once that he would never let anything happen to her and that she would never have to be as scared again as she was back then, facing going to prison. Donna can hear his words in her head as clear as if he had just said them, reassuring her now as they did in the past.

"So, what is it you wanted to talk about, Mrs. Nightingale?" Harvey asks, seating himself on the corner of Donna's desk.

"First of all, I want you over there on the sofa. It's very gallant of you to want to protect her but where would be the fun in that?" A new kind of viciousness steals itself into Melanie's voice as her gun is still pointed directly at Harvey, who doesn't seem to want to move. "Come on, move!"

Only when the gunwoman moves closer to Harvey again, does he finally stand up and take a seat on the brown sofa in the corner of Donna's office. His shoulders hunch in defeat for the fastest of seconds, before he pulls them back again.

"I must say, it is rather endearing the way you two look out for each other. That will make this whole thing even more interesting," Melanie says and sounds almost joyful at the prospect. Donna tries to not let her words affect her, concentrating all of her attention on Harvey instead.

The words seem to roll off of Harvey like liquid off a Teflon layer. His gaze is firmly fixed on Melanie, as he sits cross-legged and with his hands entwined on his knee on the sofa. "Can we maybe cut straight to the chase? The sooner you tell us what you want, the sooner we can all get out here."

"Why the hurry, Mr. Specter? Need to bring another innocent person behind bars so quickly?"

"I don't really know what you are talking about but I'm all ears. Would you care to elaborate, Mrs. Nightingale," Harvey replies and Donna is mesmerized how he manages it to sound so poised and persuasive without coming across as arrogant, which probably would not help the situation in any way.

"You don't even remember me?" Melanie asks incredulous, taking another step closer to Harvey. If her goal is to appear even more vicious, Harvey doesn't seem to notice or care.

"Of course, I do. I remember all the cases I have worked on. And I remember your husband Logan Nightingale, who was sentenced to nine years in prison for corporate espionage," Harvey explains matter-of-factly, still fixated on the woman.

The pair stares at each other intently, both trying to predict the next move of the other while also determining what to do or say next. Donna could see the thoughts running through Melanie's mind, trying to come up with the best way to reply. She can see that the woman is fighting for control, probably not having counted on Harvey being Harvey in a deadly situation as this one.

"You promised you would save him," Melanie hisses and just as Harvey had demanded, they were all of a sudden right in the middle of the argument. Donna watches them wordlessly, still at a loss as to how she could not remember this case.

"And I did! Under the circumstances, I got him the best deal he could possibly get!" Harvey defends himself, leaning forward as to emphasize his words.

"You define taking him away from his family for nine years, preventing him from watching his two daughters grow up, you define that as saving him?" Melanie wants to know, as the energy in the room changes. The anger that had been so encompassing that it was almost too much for Donna's small office, suddenly turned into despair. And it scared the owner of said office as to how quickly the atmosphere _could_ change, making it hard assess the situation and predict possible outcomes.

"I know how hard it must be for you, alone with the kids. But maybe Logan should have thought about that before he decided to sell information to a competing company. He risked the firm and thousands of jobs and lives as a consequence. And he didn't hesitate once, just so he would get the money."

"He was blackmailed into doing it and you know it!" Melanie defends her husband, her eyes about to well up with tears.

"No, he was blackmailed into covering his and a colleague's tracks, long after he had already sold the information in the first place. He could have come clean at any point in time between the first and the last crime. And _you_ know it." At last Harvey's words seem to reach her, reason softening her angry and sorrowful face.

"But he needed the money. _We_ needed the money. Our daughter was dying and we just couldn't afford all those medical bills all at once," Melanie replies, a single tear rolling down her face. "If you had a family, you would know how that feels like. Having to watch your child die because you can _not_ afford to pay the needed treatments."

For a whole minute, no one says anything. Melanie's eyes continue to be fixated on Harvey in an expectant gaze, while Harvey's drop to his lap. It is in that moment, that a movement in the left corner of the floor catches Donna's attention, oblivious to the other inhabitants of the room. She can see four special operation officers all clad in black entering through the stairwell door, two ducking behind the reception desk, the other two slowly creeping along the wall towards her office. It had never really bothered Donna that their offices were as transparent as they are, that anyone walking by could just peek inside and that one had no privacy whatsoever. Donna had get used to it even faster, her cubicle in front of Harvey's office of course a lot more exposed to passersby than the glass cubes were. But today she minds. Today she hates the fact that in such a situation it is nearly impossible for anyone to near the office unnoticed.

"But no… what am I saying… Even if you were to have a family, you would never be in that kind of situation because you probably have millions in your bank account to pay for whatever you could possibly need," continues Melanie, anger coming forth once again and distracting Donna with it for a second. "So here is what I want."

Harvey sits up straight, uncrossing his legs and focusing back on the woman that is threatening them. For a brief moment he wonders how much longer she would be able to keep pointing the weapon at him before the strength in her arm would cease, but then his attention is drawn to the movement outside of the four walls as well. Harvey only allows himself to take in the situation for a split second, not wanting to accidentally sell out their rescue squad.

"Yes, Melanie, what do you want?" Harvey says, locking his eyes with hers.

"I want you to get him a better deal. My kids need their father at home. I need him at home."

"I told you once… I wouldn't even have taken his case if I had known the extent of what he did upfront. The only thing that kept me involved was his motivation. Believe me, I get it. But he was going about it the wrong way, I still stand to that," Harvey explicates with a slight shrug of his shoulders.

"I don't care what you believe. What I care about is my husband. And we can not wait another eight and a half years for him to come back to us," Melanie shoots back, getting angrier again.

"There will be no better deal than the one he already got. Do I need to remind you, if this thing had gone to trial, due to the graveness of the case he would have been facing the maximum sentence of up to 15 years," Harvey explains, letting himself sink back against the sofa with a sigh.

Donna's eyes drift between Melanie and Harvey and every couple of seconds to the outside of the office, where the police men are gradually inching closer. They are only about fifteen feet away, when her attention is immediately drawn back on Melanie once the woman starts talking again.

"Okay… Maybe we just need to find you the right kind of motivation?" Melanie then says, her eyes still on Harvey but the gun that had been pointing at him, slowly moving in the direction of Donna. The redhead's heartbeat speeds up again, her brain having done an amazing job in erasing the feeling of being pointed at with a deadly weapon only to be slapped in the face with the sensation ten times worse than before. And yet, something snaps within Donna that she can no longer control or stop. She gets up from her chair, moving slowly towards Melanie and away from the Special Forces that were closing in. Maybe Donna could draw enough of the gunwoman's attention on her so she would not notice the doings outside of the office until it was too late.

"Sit down!" Melanie almost screams, surprised by the sudden act of bravery from Donna.

"Donna, please, stay out of this," Harvey says, looking at his former secretary for the first time since he arrived. There is panic in his eyes but it is gone as quickly as it appeared.

"How am I supposed to stay out of this when there is a gun pointed at me?" Donna wants to know in Harvey's direction and she has to suppress a bitter laugh, knowing that it is probably the wrong time for a laughing fit. She doesn't even know where the urge comes from, blaming the adrenaline that's surging through her body once more.

"Donna, please…" Harvey mouths again, the words leaving his lips in barely a whisper. Donna doesn't register his words, can't comprehend their meaning because all she wants in that moment is for it to finally be over. She lifts up her hands in surrender.

"Please, Melanie. I told you. Harvey is not a bad person. When he says he got your husband the best deal there is, he means it. There is nothing that he can do," Donna tries, supporting what Harvey had said mere minutes earlier.

"Shut up! There is always something someone can do. I'm not leaving this place without the prospect of getting my husband back sooner, do you understand me?" Melanie's agitation becomes palpable and Donna knows that they are treading on very thin ice this very moment.

"Donna, stop it," Harvey pleads again, getting ready to get out of his seat on the sofa.

"You stay where you are!" Melanie hisses towards Harvey, before she looks at Donna again. "And you! You weren't quite so brave earlier, without your knight in shining armor here," Melanie directs at the other woman, who can feel the situation reaching its breaking point two heartbeats before it does.

And then everything happens in slow motion and in a time lapse all at once. Harvey jumps up from the sofa, drawing Melanie's attention and her gun on him. There is a muffled bang from metal hitting the carpet on the floor, followed by a piercing sound that makes Donna wince and leaves a ring in her ear. Smoke is filling the room within a split second.

"What the hell? NO!" Melanie screams, panic filling her eyes. There are loud voices and heavy footfalls and the last thing Donna can see is the gunwoman's hate-filled gaze landing on Harvey as she repositions the pistol and before Donna can think twice about it, she closes the last two feet that are separating her from Harvey and is just about to push him out of harms way, when another lout bang pierces the air and a blinding pain hits Donna in her shoulder. She crashes into something solid before it gives way, making her land on the couch. She cries out from the pain that spreads from her right shoulder like a wildfire through her whole body. Thousands of tiny stars make it hard for her to see anything at all and only through like cotton wool does she hear screams and voices all around her. Warmth engulfs her, strong arms securing her in a protective embrace. Something that sounds a lot like her name is being whispered into her ear over and over again and while the voice is so familiar the worry and fear in its timbre contorts it into a new sound entirely. One that reaches a place so deep inside of her soul that she had no idea it even existed. And then heaviness pulls on her, just as blackness reduces her field of vision.


	7. Chapter 6

(Chapter 6)

"Donna?" Harvey's voice becomes almost frantic, as he presses the dress handkerchief from his breast pocket against her shoulder. "Donna, please. Please stay with me!" He whispers, shaking her slightly in his arms. "Come on, stay with me." The smoke makes it almost impossible for him to see anything except for her flaming red hair that's splayed all across his arms. The feeling of her slack body in his arms drives him nearly out of his mind.

"Mr. Specter?" Harvey hears the voice from far away, even though it is probably only a couple of feet away.

"We're here! In the left corner of the office. Please hurry, Donna has been shot!" Harvey says, a new kind of desperation in his voice. The cloth in his hand has been bled through for minutes now and even though he can feel the long wound under his fingers, telling him that it most probably is only a graze wound, the fact that Donna has been unconscious for just as many minutes worries him more and more.

Just then, a police man and an emergency medical physician fight their way through the smoke. The EMP, a young, dark-haired woman in her early thirties, crouches down beside them, taking a look at the situation even though it is hard to see anything to begin with.

"Hello Mr. Specter, I'm Dr. Ally Landon and I'll be taking care of your colleague," she introduces herself, before leaning down and bringing her hand to Donna's throat. "Her heartbeat is strong but we need to get her out of here, so I can look at the bullet wound," explains the woman. "My paramedics are already on their way up here with a gurney. It might take some more minutes until the elevators are working again though." Ally stands up, signaling the officer to help her. "Let's get her out."

"No, it's okay. I'll carry her," Harvey stops the guy, getting up from the sofa. As if she weighs nothing, Harvey picks Donna up and carries her through the smoke and out of the office.

When they reach the lobby, he gently lays her down on the reception desk. His eyes stay on her and he still presses the handkerchief to her shoulder even though it is no longer soaking up any of the blood.

"I'll take it from here now, Mr. Specter," Ally says determined, walking up beside him and gently pushing him to the side, so she can take care of the redhead.

While the EMP pulls the bloody cloth away and examines the wound, Harvey moves to the other side of Donna, half-sitting and half-leaning against the desk at her legs. He touches her carefully, wrapping his hand around her ankle. Harvey knows that people around him can see what he is doing and he knows he should probably leave and just let the doctor do her job. But he can't stand the thought of leaving her alone, having her wake up with no one there for here. And he needs to reassure himself as well. That she is still here. With him.

And she is. Her skin is cold to the touch but as soft as he has always remembered and imagined it to be. After a couple of moments, Harvey looks up from their physical connection into the direction of the doctor, who is looking at him with a knowing and encouraging smile. "It's just a graze wound, nothing that we won't be able to handle."

"Then why is she not waking up?" Harvey wants to know, relief and worry still wrestling inside of his chest.

"Do you know if she hit her head or anything when she took the bullet?" Ally asks in return.

"No. She fell against me but I caught her," the lawyer explains, looking at Donna's lifeless face.

"Well, it can be a number of things really. A situation like this one is hard on the body. The constant stress for hours, a heightened heartrate, the pain of the graze wound. And she does seem to have gotten at least one hit to the head earlier," Ally explains, pointing at the dried blood on Donna's left temple. In the heat of the moment, Harvey hadn't even noticed the wound on her head before and as he looks at it now, a new wave of anger and despair crashes over him. "Sometimes, the body just shuts down then when it gets too much. But you really don't have to worry, she will wake up soon."

"Okay," replies Harvey, the words of the EMP instilling at least some kind of calmness.

"Do you by any chance know if she has a healthcare proxy or an advance healthcare directive? Someone we can call in case decisions have to be made while she is still out?"

"I…" Harvey begins, his heart retracting. He should know these things, shouldn't he? Then again, yes, they were close, but they had never talked about stuff like that. And yet, Harvey is pretty sure that _she_ knows that he has these kinds of documents and who his emergency contact is, so it does make him sad that he does not know about her. "I'm not sure. But I have the number of Dr. Swindon, her GP. If anyone knows, it's him," Harvey says, pulling out his cellphone.

"No need. I know Dr. Swindon, he's working part time at our hospital. I'll check in with him as soon as I've taken care of Donna's wound."

Harvey watches her curiously and supervisingly as she cleans the wound with a pad, before injecting Donna with a lucid liquid. "That is to prevent an infection. The next one will be for the pain," Dr. Landon explains and Harvey is thankful that she's keeping him in the loop of what she's doing, convincing him that she knows what she's doing. After the second injection, the doctor puts a tape over the wound to close it up. "She will need to get some stiches but I'd rather take her to the hospital for that. We'll do a quick check-up additionally to see if everything is alright."

Ally shrugs out of her bloody gloves and throws them into the trash bin, before putting the tape and the medication back into her backpack. "I'll contact Dr. Swindon now. As far as I remember, he's taking the nightshift at the ER today."

While the doctor moves a few feet away to speak into her walkie-talkie, Harvey stays with Donna, his heart aching for her to wake up. And even more so for him to wake up from this god awful nightmare that has been dragging on for way too long as it is. Harvey squeezes her ankle, hoping that she somehow would be able to feel that he was there. Only for a second does he think about Melanie, where they had brought her and what would happen to her now. But then his eyes fall back on Donna's sleeping face again and all thoughts but those about his redhead are pushed out of his mind.

A couple of moments later, Dr. Landon returns to them, smiling at Harvey. "That was quick," Harvey notes, looking at her expectantly.

"Yes, indeed. It seems to be a quiet night at the ER and Charlie could give me the needed information immediately," Ally replies.

"And?"

"Well… Under normal circumstances I wouldn't be allowed to talk about it… but as it seems, _you_ are Ms. Paulsen's emergency contact."

Harvey's heart leaps in his chest and he can almost feel it pumping against his ribcage. When did that happen? How did that happen? Does she really know that she was his emergency contact as well and did it just to return the favor? Or has it always been like that? So many questions and he would give everything just to being able to ask her them right now.

"So, does that mean I can come with you to the hospital?" Harvey instead asks Dr. Landon.

"You don't have to. But if you want to, yes, sure, you can ride along."

* * *

The New York night rushes by as Harvey looks at their entwined fingers, praying that she would finally wake up again. His thumb circles the soft skin between her thumb and index finger, the motion hypnotizing and calming his nerves. His gaze glides along her sleeveless arm, resting on the bandage on her upper arm that is slowly but surly soaking itself up with blood again. Harvey sighs, closing his eyes and taking a couple of slow and even breaths. And just when his heartrate is about to normalize itself, it speeds right back up again, when he can feel the hand in his hand twitching.

Harvey's eyes snap open, finding Donna's as she looks groggily at him.

"Heeeey…", Donna whispers, barely able to keep her eyes open.

"Hey there, sleepyhead," Harvey replies, not able to keep the relief out of his face and out of his words.

"Are you okay?" Donna wants to know, her voice raspy.

Harvey almost chuckles at the absurdity of the question. She is lying in an ambulance with a bullet wound and asks if he was okay. He wants to say so much, do even more, like hug her and kiss her and tell her that she scared the shit out of him and that he needs her and never wants to leave her out of his sight and life again. But he knows that that would have to wait, that now is not the right time for that. So instead he opts for a lighter reply. "Well, apart from the fact that you totally robbed me of my masculinity by jumping in the line of fire, yeah, I'm okay."

"Please. If any man's ego can take it, it's yours!" Donna replies, and her slight laugh gets disrupted by a throaty cough. Her eyes become more awake though, the sparkling, _his_ sparkling, the one that he always pretends is reserved only for him, warming his heart. "But yeah, I'm sorry for saving your life," Donna continues, rolling her eyes in mock annoyance. The smile on her lips however tells him, that she is only teasing him. He lifts his one hand in defense, only just then realizing that he is still holding on to hers with the other one. Also realizing how good it feels, how natural and how right.

"Well… I… I guess I better not tell you then that I was wearing a bulletproof west…" Harvey replies, that boyish smirk of his lightening up his worried face.

"You've got to be kidding me…" Donna looks at him with wide eyes. "Oh my God. You are serious."

Without saying anything more, Harvey loosens the tie around his neck, before starting to unbutton his dress shirt. With every inch that he is exposing, the black material of the west is coming forth.

"Well, thanks for warning me, Specter," Donna shakes her head in disbelief, the exhaustion momentarily forgotten thanks to the banter between them.

"If you remember correctly, I did try to tell you a couple of times to stay out of it. I practically begged you!" Harvey replies accusingly, and he presses his lips together to keep himself from smiling too much.

"Alright, you know, next time someone's pointing a gun at you, I'll just stay on the sideline and watch."

"Yes, you better be. I already feel castrated one-sided. I don't want to lose my other testicle as well."

That's when Donna bursts out laughing for good and within seconds all the fissures on Harvey's heart are healed. Just like that. His Donna is still here. They still have a chance. And so he laughs with her, their eyes finding each other in the kind of intense connection they always only ever reach with each other. The paramedic on the front seat looks at them through the slide window but the pair doesn't even notice. They laugh for seconds, minutes, and Donna's heart starts healing as well.

Harvey looks at her in wonder and when he squeezes her hand, only then does Donna realize as well that they were still holding on to each other. All of a sudden, they grow serious, their laughing reduced to solemn eyes and loving smiles.

"Donna?"

"Yes, Harvey?"

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For saving my life anyway."

Harvey squeezes her hand again and keeps holding on to it the entire ride to the hospital. Only reluctantly does he let go when they reach their destination and Donna is pulled out of the backside of the ambulance. He can immediately feel the emptiness in his hand and the realization hits him like a punch in the gut. Harvey has never really been known to the world as the greatest hand holder on the planet, has never really needed any kind of physical connection with a woman outside of bed and definitely has never been a huge fan of public displays of affection but just like anything else when it comes to Donna, things are different. Because _she_ is different. And on this evening in particular, holding on to her hand had felt like holding on to the moment that he does not want to let pass. Not tonight and not ever again. So when that lifeline is taken away from him, his hand all of a sudden feels hollow and he himself lost.

But if he can not hold on to her, at least he would not let her out of his sight. And so Harvey stays with her through it all, even when the doctors want to send him to the waiting room. While he sits on the rotary stool in the corner of their cabin, he watches intently as Dr. Swindon takes care of his patient. Donna puts on a brave face when the doctor cleans the wound once again but when her eyes look for Harvey's, he can see the pain and exhaustion that are glimmering in there. How much he wishes he could take away her pain, to be the one to lie there and not her, all just because she wanted to save him. And he knows that she _is_ the only one who can safe him but not by getting herself killed in the process. And yet, that is exactly what they were doing anyway. Every day they spend together but _apart_ feels a little like dying every time. And Harvey doesn't understand for the life of him why they would do that to each other. How they could keep doing that to each other. So after approximately five thousand days of tiny deaths, of missed dinners and Sundays on the couch and hugs and kisses and nights spent together, Harvey decides that it is finally enough. He does not want to die another death and he most certainly does not want _her_ to die before they even started _living._ Together. He promises to himself that he would do everything in his power to convince her that it is finally time to break her goddamn rule, to make her see that they are _it_ for each it other even though she had told him that she does not want more. Just as he had lied back then, he prays that she had as well.

Harvey is pulled out of his thoughts, when he hears Donna hiss. Dr. Swindon had just injected her with local anesthetics so he could stich up the wound. Once again, he wants nothing more than to take the pain away from her. And while he can not do that, he at least wants to let her know that he is here. So Harvey rolls with his chair to her side, gently taking her hand in his once more, momentarily distracting her from the discomfort with an apologetic smile. The wall that she had kept upright pretty much the whole time, comes finally crumbling down before his eyes. Fatigue, fear, anger, pain, sadness, affection and at least a dozen more emotions he wishes he could name all wash over her face in different intensities but overwhelming all the same. He caresses her hand, tells her with his eyes that he is there for her, that he would take her pain if he could and because she is Donna, he knows that she knows.

By the time they are finally allowed to leave the hospital it is way after midnight. While they are waiting for the cab, Harvey puts his suit jacket around her shoulders, and because he needs the affirmation that she is still here with him once again, he wraps one arm around her, letting his arm rest on her waist. His heart almost bursts when she lets him, instead of looking for distance leaning into his side with a sigh.

* * *

"Will you be okay?" Harvey asks, while watching Donna enter her apartment. She turns around to look at him and he thinks he has never seen her be more beautiful than right in this second. His former secretary. His COO. His friend and his warrior. His saving grace. The woman who stood by him, guided him and saved him more times than he can count. The woman who had literally taken a bullet for him today even though she had told him all those years ago that she would never do that in a literal sense. His heart fills itself up with gratitude and with that mysterious other feeling that has always been there in the deepest corner of his heart, yet that he had never truly recognized or named, too afraid of the consequences.

"I… I think so. Yeah," she mumbles her reply, unconsciously hugging her upper body to protect her from whatever this night might bring. Harvey can count on one hand the times during which Donna had looked as lost and helpless as she does in this very moment, each and every one etched into his heart. He had sworn to her once that he would never let anything happen to her, that she would never have to be that scared again. And yet he can see that she is more scared than ever before.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Harvey wants to know, his voice dropping to the special timbre it always _always_ only ever drops to when he is speaking to her. He hopes that she knows that when he says anything, he literally means _anything_ , knowing that there is not a single thing that he wouldn't do for her. No hesitation. No questions asked. The look he gives her is empathic, intense and full of warmth and affection. He can see that she is truly considering her possibilities instead of just brushing his question off, like he had almost expected her to do.

"Wi… no. No. It's okay. Thank you, Harvey. For coming for me. For going to the hospital with me. For holding my hand when they stitched me up. And for giving me a ride home. I really appreciate it," Donna says at last with a sad but honest smile.

"You threw yourself in the line of fire for me, Donna. That was the least I could do. And if you need _anything_ , please, let me know, okay?" Harvey insists with emphasis, earning himself a thankful nod. They look at each other for long moments, both not ready to let the other out of their sight just yet or to say goodbye or to let another goddamn moment pass. As the heartbeats drag on, he wants nothing more than to go inside with her, to sit down with her and have that talk that's been thirteen years overdue. But the utter exhaustion on her face tells him, that tonight is not the night. So Harvey is the first to break the eye contact before he loses himself entirely. He nods good night and with a small smile turns around, his heart heavy. He can hear her sigh and then her door squeaking quietly. Harvey waits for the soft click that would tell him that another moment had passed them by. But it never comes. Instead, he can hear his name, barely above a whisper.

"Yeah?" He turns around again, his gaze finding hers in the blink of an eye.

"Would…. Would you mind… staying tonight?" The redhead seems nervous and Harvey knows that it costs her a lot to admit that kind of weakness to anyone. And yet, he admires her for her strength to do it anyway.

"Of course not. I told you, I'd do anything for you," Harvey replies without hesitation, closing the distance to her. She steps aside, letting him in and immediately feeling the safety his closeness always instills in her.

"Do you want me to open a bottle of wine for us?" Harvey asks, as they walk into the living room. He hasn't been to her apartment very often and yet still often enough for it to feel a little like home.

"I don't think that's a very good idea, considering the painkillers I'm on," Donna chuckles, still nervous. She hadn't really thought this whole thing through, so she has absolutely no idea what to do next.

"Uhm. Yeah. Of course. You are right," Harvey replies as Donna's nervousness swaps over and into him.

"Would… would it be okay, if we just went to bed? I'm… just… _so_ exhausted…"

"Of course. Whatever you need," Harvey replies and walks her to her room. As if it is the most natural thing on the planet, ignoring any kind of awkwardness that would probably pop up in any other similar situation, Harvey helps her undress, carefully pulling the sleeve over her injured shoulder. His finger grazes the bandage, making her wince and him hiss. The urge to wrap himself around her becomes so overpowering, that he has to master all of his strength to not do just that. They both realize that him undressing her in the seclusion of her bedroom should probably feel stranger than it actually does, the situation so innocent that not the tiniest of inappropriate thoughts crosses his or her mind. Donna's black dress drops around to her ankles, leaving her in only her lace underwear.

"Sit," Harvey orders her, before he walks over to the adjourning bathroom to get a wet washcloth and a towel. Donna watches him with tired eyes, wanting nothing more than to just fall asleep now. Once he returns, Harvey washes off the remaining blood from her shoulder, carful to not get too close to the wound again. He also wipes the cloth gently over her forehead and the rest of the face, removing the smeared eyeliner and remnants of her make-up, as well as the blood from her left temple. When he's finished, he walks over to her closet to find her something to sleep in.

"Top drawer on the left," Donna yawns sleepily, fighting against the unconsciousness that is threatening to take over now. She can feel it in every limb and every muscle, the heat, terror and exhaustion of the day finally catching up with her for good. Harvey helps her into a t-shirt that is way too big for her, only briefly wondering from which guy she could have possibly stolen it, before he watches her crawl under the covers. He wishes her a good night and is just about to leave the room, getting mentally ready for a night on her sofa – simultaneously too far away and yet way too close to her – when her voice stops him from leaving her once again.

"Please stay with me? I mean… It doesn't mean that…."

"Donna, don't," Harvey interrupts her before she can say any more. He walks back to her side, crouching down to look into her face. He gently brushes a stray strand of hair out of her face, relishing in the feeling of how soft it is to his touch. He knows their timing sucks yet again but he just can't hear her say one more time that what they do doesn't mean anything. Not tonight. "Please, Donna. Just for once, let's not pretend that it doesn't mean anything. Because we both know that it does. And it's _okay_. Okay? We don't have to talk about it tonight. But we should soon," Harvey says truthfully and he can feel the weight being lifted off his chest upon his confession. Like the concrete blocks, that had kept him under water for weeks, months and years even, had finally been cut lose from around his legs and he could now finally swim back to the surface again, breathing freely. "Because I don't want to waste another moment not telling you when something _means_ something. When it means _everything_."

Donna is at a loss of words, too overwhelmed and yet too exhausted to form any coherent thoughts, even though she wants to say so much. So instead she nods _okay_ , relaxing at last when he slides into bed right behind her. And it finally _is_ okay, when he wraps an arm around her, pulling her safely against his body. It's okay when she leans back against him, sighing in content and falling asleep the second his warmth and security seep into her. It's okay when she wakes up screaming from a nightmare shortly after and he holds her while she cries in his arms, soaking his shirt but he couldn't care less in that moment, forever grateful that she had allowed him to stay and be there for her when she needs him the most. It is okay when he tells her how brave he thinks she is and how thankful he is to have her in his life and how much means to him. It's okay when her hand slips under the white cotton of his t-shirt, letting it rest over his beating heart, showing him with a gesture what she can't form in words. _"I have your heart and I will take care of it. Because I love you"._ And it's okay when they fall back to sleep moments later, wrapped around and in each other, feeling closer than ever before. It's okay, when that hand gently caresses his stomach, hours later, when it's still dark outside and just them inside, close, raw and the need to feel each other so all-consuming, that neither finds the strength to hold back anymore. And it is _okay_. When their lips find each other in a gentle touch, when his tongue seeks entrance with a tentative movement, when her hand runs through his hair, making him shiver and sigh. It's okay when he gently rolls her onto her back and himself above her and when he starts worshipping her body like she is the most precious gift he has ever received. It is okay when they undress, first her t-shirt and underwear, then his in a hasty attempt to finally become one after over a decade apart. It's okay when new tears well in Donna's eyes because he's so careful with her, not wanting to risk hurting her any more than she had already been hurt that day because of him. It's okay when he kisses her with all of the accumulated love he feels and it's okay when he finally tells her with words, moments before he shows her with his body. It is okay, when he slowly slides into her welcoming body and when she moans and he shakes, both so overcome with the sensation, that they almost lose it right then and there. It's okay that it's slow and peaceful, intense and breathtaking all at once and it's okay that it's over in a matter of minutes, the reunion so long awaited even though the need for it never voiced, that losing themselves in each other is the only and ultimate goal. And it's okay because even though they still have a lot to talk about and to figure out, they also know that this has been only the first of many more times to come. Times they would draw out the ultimate salvation for as long as they possibly could, times they would not leave the bed for a whole weekend and times where they wouldn't even make it as far as to the bed in the first place. Times where they would lie on the sofa, drink a glass of red wine before professing their love for each other, joining in another slow dance of their bodies that would last forever. So it is okay when it is over so soon that first night and when they fall asleep right afterwards, because they both know that there would be _more_. _And that it is going to be okay_.

 **The End**

* * *

A/N: I actually dreamt about Donna being shot and lying/dying in Harvey's arms a couple of weeks ago. And since those pictures wouldn't go away, I just had to get them out of my head. What I thought would be a One Shot turned out to be a bit longer but I hope you didn't mind :) I would really love to hear your thoughts on it, if you have the time. Thank you so much for reading!


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